I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
