He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
