it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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