The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
