I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
