Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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