He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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