Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize