actually, I'm a sock model
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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