She said her name was "party"
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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