Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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