everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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