Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
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