So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
