It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I've blown a few things in my day
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
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