my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
