piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
