forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
