Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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