Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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