your thong is hanging out like whoa
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize
