Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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