i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Randomize
