There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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