erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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