I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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