he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
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