I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
You can't just leave with hair like that
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
