C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Someone stole a lamp last night.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
