I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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