what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
