Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
