Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
