Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
