it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
My ATM looks so different sober.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
