Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
