i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
