why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
