You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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