Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
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