his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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