That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
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So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
