So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
So I just went to clothing optional bar
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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