Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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