Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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