Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Randomize
