He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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