Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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