Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
