I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
